From what I can tell, your ME RP is "Mass Effect: Mental Illness Edition". You've got a neurotic quarian and a schizo salarian. All you need is a Turian with ADHD and you're set.
we don’t have a turian like that but there is a backup guy who might eat people. i have not seen him in action yet though. i am pretty sure tcho’tchke is by far the worst of the lot in terms of mental baggage, the salarian (who is named, uh, flavor contry [not a typo]) is a total nutbar but does not let it get him down. the two vorcha in the group are much more well-adjusted, which is kind of sad; we had an intelligent one obsessed with politicial theory who left the group because everyone else was too insufferable for him to deal with (sharr), and the other was a genuinely nice if slightly dim guy raised in isolation by a bunch of wrestling videos (kruor). we engineered this group of characters to be as dysfunctional as possible, basically. they still have no group cohesion but they are now all fugitives and 3/4 of them are now stuck living together in a small junk-filled hoarder hellhole ship. this is a very serious campaign as you can tell.
in the next few sessions flavor contry and kruor are staying on but everyone else switched out for saner characters. i think they are probably saner. at least mine is, but compared to the overemotional mess i was playing before i guess that isn’t saying much. she’s a krogan ecologist funding her research with money obtained from working as a blood pack merc. <:
i play a mass effect tabletop game with friends and this is who i play as (tho i recently benched him to play as a botanist krogan in the next campaign) and his name is admiral tcho’tchke vas cetka. he is not a real admiral by any stretch.
he is kind of a walking quarian stereotype except that he never returned from his pilgrimage because he is an incredibly neurotic and petty person who did not want to give up the junk he obsessively hoards. i don’t think they would want him back on the fleet though, he is a pretty unpleasant individual to be around. i kind of feel bad for him at this point but there are still many valid reasons why he doesn’t have any friends.
he spent a lot of the past campaign drunk and crying on the floor. he also accidentally killed a volus in one of the most horrifying ways possible because i rolled too well on a check to disable the guy’s armor, and stole a fake potted plant from a nearby apartment building. gats' schizotypal salarian whacked him in the face with an aluminum bat at one point and now the visor is broken and i'm keeping it that way. our group is really good
i’m serious, my favourite masseffect to play as is the volus even though i’m not good at it because it means i get to see them fall down ramps and stairs a lot
i also like playing volus because my engineer has the best colour scheme, in game he looks more like his namesake (sherbert) but when i draw him he looks like a fucking 80s roller rink which is still ok
i just wanted everyone to know about this volus
apparently you get a picture of tali’s real face if you romance her, but i didn’t, so i can keep on thinking she looked more like this
or at least that she had sideways slit pupils like goats
WHOOPS I PUT THIS ON THE WRONG BLOG….
i still can’t get over grunt’s shadow broker dossier
so i made it the name of my mass effect 3 blind run liveblog (i have no idea how i’ve managed to avoid spoilers for this considering how leaky it was, but i did it)
wigmund said: They should just make it where Shepard can romance everyone on thr ship regardless of species or gender. Including EDI, Legion and any Volus, Hanar or Elcor recruits.
why can’t you take up all those krogan breeding requests after grunt’s loyalty mission
stoicsilence said: who did you romance? i did miranda because she was hitting on me, but i ended up longing for tali or samara.
my romantic life in mass effect is a sad tale of thickheadedness and missed opportunities.
in me1 i just wanted to learn about biotic implants. that’s all i wanted out of what i believed to be a completely professional relationship with kaidan. at no point did i think to myself, yes this is the character i want to bang, i just thought i was being nice. I THOUGHT WE WERE BROS. I THOUGHT WE WERE BROS RIGHT UP TO THE POINT IN THE ROMANCE SCENE WHERE HE AND SHEPARD START MACKING ON EACH OTHER. unfortunately i hadn’t saved in a while and didn’t want to redo the bit before that scene (i don’t remember what it was anymore) so i sucked it up and accepted it. there weren’t any better options anyway so i might as well stick with it.
then me2 and better options came along. but i’m… terminally monogamous. the prospect going after another character i liked better when i hadn’t REALLY broken up with kaidan would be… unfaithful. and rude. and would make me feel guilty. even if i the player thought kaidan was lackluster and i was lukewarm for him at the best of times, obviously commander shepard did not agree with me and i uh, didn’t want to damage anything more than it already had been. so i waffled my way through character interactions halfway hoping i would get a surprise romance scene with somebody i actually liked, but unwilling to overtly hit on anyone. i WAS angling for garrus, really hard for garrus (in the most wishy washy way possible), but i fucked it up because he asked me if i wanted to go down to the deserted lower hangar and engage in some friendly WRESTLIN and the implications went right over my head, so i unknowlingly friendzoned him. i also panicked with thane and shut him down by accident. THAT IS MY STORY
tbh if orientation hadn’t been a deciding factor in me2 i probably would have gone for miranda and not felt bad about it. she and paragon shepard might have made a good match?? i like garrus best out of all possible options but i think he would probably be better with a neutral or renegade shepard. though i actually didn’t know samara was an option! i thought she was celibate as part of her wandering space samurai vows/she was unwilling to have another relationship after her wife died and her daughters turned out to be ardat-yakshi.
i kinda want to restart my playthrough before mass effect 3 comes out because i screwed up really bad in the romance department, but i don’t want to lose my shepard.
spleenbrick said: these own, draw a geth next pls
derse would be a Fun place